To Be Or Not To Be…An Asshole

I’ll confess. I work for a company that sends lots of email. It’s not like we sell crack to crack whores — we sell conferences and one of our tactics is to use email. We’re CAN-SPAM compliant. (As if those laws have actually helped cut the number of real SPAM anyone gets…)  But as we’ve watched email ROI eclipse direct mail over the last 18 months or so, we’re fans of email. And while we know some people hate email, for us it’s a necessary evil.

We’re not perfect in our email sends, yet we constantly look at how many emails one person can get over a certain period of time and how to make our opt out process easier for our recipients. But my inbox was an interesting study in the world of human behavior this morning.

First there was this:

“Goddammit!

I don’t appreciate you assholes spamming the fuck out of me!

I wouldn’t go to one of your conferences now if you paid for the whole thing. And I’ll damn sure recommend against attending your conferences to all of my colleagues.

What a piss-poor marketing strategy.

I’ve been putting up with this shit for months, and I’m sick and tired of it. Get my e-mail address out of your databases immediately!

cc: Attorney General, State of California, Attorney General, State of Illinois, Attorney General, State of New York, Attorney General, State of Nevada.”
(my note: ooooh. scary.)

Then there was this:

“I’d be grateful if you could help me with a bit of a problem I have.

Somehow, your company got ahold of my email address, and has been sending me invitations to things I have no interest in.

I would be grateful if you would ensure that I never again receive email from any of your business units. I think it’s better to do it this way than to forward this to our email team to request that your domains be blocked.”

Both names will immediately be removed from our global list — but I have to admit, I am tempted to provide the first guy’s email to as many “sign me up” boxes I find across the web. Call me evil…